Minor Setback

"Less than 1% of people with an injury like yours recover without flare ups along the way." - my back doctor

That does NOT make dealing with the current pain any easier!

I just needed to get that out!

In other news, outside of my back hurting, life is good. I have a husband who loves me, a few high quality friends who support me, and I'm learning how to be my own best friend.

June is Busting Out All Over

Today is the first day of June. I have decided to really focus on losing weight again this month. In March and April, I did a great job of exercising and eating healthy daily - it became routine! In May, I continued to eat well, but was not as consistent with the exercise. This week, I've been exercising again and it feels great! So, I am back on track to make June my most successful month yet.

Here are my goals:

*Continue to not eat sugar

*Water aerobics five times a week

*Cardio before or after pool

*Drink lots of water

*Post daily progress on Twitter

This all seems totally doable and I am pumped! Feel free to join me in making June the best month yet and let me know how you are doing! Together, we can do this.

Tippity Tap Tap

In honor of National Tap Dance Day, the amazing Nicholas Brothers. Enjoy!

Snoozing Whilst Typing

My sleep cycle is completely and totally out of whack! ARGH! I hate this with a passion.

Two nights ago, I was up past 4 am. This is not good, nor is it healthy. That whole next day I wouldn't let myself rest with the hopes I would sleep well that night. And boy did I. Like 10 hours or something amazing. Then we get to last night and for whatever reason I couldn't sleep again.

What's up with that (Cue SNL music)?

Tonight's goal = sleep!

In other news, I recently finished training for an incredible volunteer program. It's something I've wanted to do for years. Basically, I get to help a youth who is a dependent of the courts. I once knew a girl who told me her volunteer from this program was "the only consistent adult" in her life. After she told me that, I knew one day I would be sworn in by a judge to advocate for teen.

I'm so tired. Must stay awake til a normal hour.

Tonight So You Think You Can Dance premieres. I love love love this show. Yes, I love it so much it warrants 3, now 4, loves. My question is how can they do a competition show with only one night a week? When will the contestants be eliminated? I just hope they know before they've learned a new dance and practiced for a week. Hmmm... Can't wait!

By the way, "they" say that sleep is one of the most important things for weight loss. Since losing weight is one of my top priorities these days, it would be really nice if sleep would happen. Thank you.

One last thing... I got a PSVita! I am absolutely adoring it. Awesome purchase.

Life Is Just A Bowl Of Cherries

I disappeared. I apologize. Life became so great that I stopped thinking about the computer!

My focus on my health - mind and body - intensified ten fold. The gym has become a regular part of my life, I have cut out all added sweeteners, and the true happiness I feel in my core is overwhelming.

I will make a point to add blogging back into my life.

In other news, I need a job! I am currently looking for employment and it's a crazy market out there. I think my new attitude is only going to make me more attractive to employers. Fingers and toes crossed something wonderful will happen!

Thanks for not giving up on me.

Tentatively Trying

I started my taxes today. Is it strange that I kind of think they're fun to do? Don't know why, but I do. Of course, having to pay taxes isn't any fun. I just like filling out the forms. Odd, trust me, I know.

I'm trying really hard to take care of myself through this stressful time. My life has turned into me taking care of someone close to me, and in doing so, I had forgotten about myself. This person, who I love dearly, doesn't seem to realize that we are going through everything together. When I try to talk about my feelings, we end up talking about theirs instead. We talk all the time, but now I'm trying to put a bit of space between us. Every time we hang up, I end up in tears. And this loved one has no idea. I know tears is not what is wanted for me. So, space is what I need to protect myself.

My weight has become a non-issue for me. Since health is so important, I think it needs to come back on my radar. The good news is that I haven't gained any weight even while dealing with so much stress. I haven't lost any either. Am still at the exact same weight - to the ounce! Amazing. One area I have not slacked is water guzzling. I am still drinking water like no other - looks like that helps.

Time for veggie stir-fry. What a delicious lunch that will be. And no sugar popsicles for dessert. Yum.

Turning this frown upside down.

Stressed

I want life to be positive - filled with sunshine and roses. Unfortunately, life has been complicated and miserable. So, I'm just going to post what is going well...

Throughout all the family stress, I didn't gain an ounce.
The medical family crisis is almost over.
My husband is incredibly supportive.

For now, that's all I've got. My back still hurts, I'm in the middle of family drama, my best friend is working nights so we never connect, my other best friend is leaving for a couple weeks when I need her most. I will survive. Just might not write as much as I'm looking for the strength to get through this.

V Davis Warms My Little Heart

This video brings me so much joy! I love these guys...and Adelle!

Words and Blessings

All I am doing lately is playing word games...and I love it! I am playing all three word games with friends that Zynga offers. If you would like to play me, my user name is Elle Bizzle. I don't want to sound like I'm bragging, but I must give you fair warning that I'm pretty good. Hehehe. That feels so silly to say.

Why is it in our culture that it is okay to admit our shortcomings, but not to celebrate our own strengths?

I'm really lucky to have my immediate support system around me. My body doesn't like to cooperate sometimes - my back has been hurting like a mother making it so just walking around my living space is a challenge today. Oddly enough, I'm not isolated here at home. My dear friend is going to come over today (perhaps video games are in order) to keep me company. I think that is just the sweetest thing! And my husband helps me in anyway he can and is so loving and supportive.

I sit in awe of how blessed I am.

More Equals Weight Loss

After the holidays, my body started to crave vegetables. I constantly want salads with very little dressing, or vegetable stir fry, or something else equally delicious and veggie-filled. It wasn't a New Year's Resolution, it was just a natural shift. About a week ago, my body no longer wanted to intake meat. I haven't had red meat in years, but even poultry stopped being appealing. Yesterday, I wanted a snack, and I turned to fruit! What? This is so unlike me. I'm not sure where the change is coming from, but I can say that I feel so much better. Maybe I am truly listening to my body for the first time and giving it what it needs, not what I thought it wanted.

Beverages. I don't drink alcohol at all. It's not my thing. The only drink I enjoy outside of water is Coca Cola Classic. Lately, I can't drink more than a few sips before I'm over the soda. What does this mean? I am drinking water like no other. There is always a glass of water by my side - and I love it!

So, what's making the difference in my body? Is it the veggies or the water?

The most exciting outcome...I've lost two pounds this week! Yippee! Whatever the cause, the diet change or the water increase, I am going to keep up with both!

Truly Happy

I have had the most amazing weekend. Honestly, I feel so happy and content - which is completely bonkers when you consider I am in the heart of a family crisis and my back is in constant pain. Yet, I'm happy.

The question is: Why?

I think it is because I am taking the time to be grateful for every moment. Almost losing a loved one has made me become increasingly aware of each positive happening in my life. I'm also enjoying the little things more than ever.

Today I started that new journal. I was really nervous about ruining it (does anyone else feel like that when starting something new?)so I bought some pens and stickers and began writing this colorful journal that reflects my positive outlook. Thank goodness for Target's 99 cents wall of scrapbooking stickers. I was able to feel like I went crazy with my shopping, without spending much money.

Focusing on being healthier - mind, body, soul - has already helped me to be a happier person. How is this focus helping you in your life?

Possibilities

My body misses exercise. With my back in as much pain as it is, it has been hard to even walk through a grocery store let alone exercise. This morning I tried to figure out some things I can do without straining my body. This is promising and gives me much hope. Fingers crossed I will be able to continue this in the future.

Lately, I have been wanting to journal, but not in my lined paper journal. I feel like it's easy when journaling to get stuck in the negative when confined by lines. Is that strange? So, today I found a cute little non-lined journal that I had used for studying many years ago. Most pages are blank, so I removed the used pages. But now I look at all the possibility in the emptiness and don't know where to begin! Suggestions?

Last night I made Blueberry Muffins for the first time. They came out so tasty that my husband called them "a-maz-ing"! The recipe I used is the Blueberry Crumb Muffins from the allrecipes.com app. If I could figure out how to upload a photo from my iPad, I would. Next time I want to try the To Die For Blueberry Muffins. Yum.

All in all, 2012 is promising to be a better year than last.

Essentials to Happiness

The grand essentials to happiness in this life are something to do, something to love, and something to hope for. ~Joseph Addison


It is funny how love makes us do and put up with things we never thought we would. But we can only hope the ones who love us in return will tolerate us as well.

Today my focus on the road to health and happiness is water. Yep, good ol' H2O. For a long while there I was drinking so much water everyday, it had become a habit. In the past week or so, I've noticed I'm not hydrating enough. So, that's my hope. To drink a plenitude of water today.

There was a time when I really enjoyed writing. There is nothing quite like sitting in a quiet spot with pen, paper, and thoughts. Today that is my "to do". I am going to sit and write letters and maybe even journal. I find writing just for myself harder to do. Perhaps it doesn't feel as meaningful as it used to. I'm not sure.

And since my life is luckily filled with love, this will all be done with happiness in my heart.

I'm Back. For Reals.

I had to disappear for awhile. It was hard on me emotionally, but a necessary truth. There was a family emergency I had to attend to. Things are going to be okay, but we are not out of the woods yet.
Sadly, this means I slacked on the majority of my personal goals. How could I worry about my own health - physical/emotional/mental/spiritual - when my whole being was devoted to the care of a loved one? I know I did what needed to be done, but I'm still disappointed in how this effected me.
My back has gone out worse than it has in years. Walking from my car to inside the store and my back feels done and I just go home. I haven't been able to exercise or even do basic day-to-day cleaning. I'm really looking forward to getting back in the pool which I think should be within a week or so.
Life hasn't been all bad, just challenging. Luckily, I have an amazing (yes, the word is overused but he truly is) husband who has stepped up in ways I could never have dreamed. A few friends have really stood out as being true and solid. Incredible how in our toughest times our truest friends are right there with support.
Looking to a positive 2012 is filling my heart with hope. I am excited to get back in the pool - I can't wait to be healthier. My husband and I are going to start meditating and church shopping. Maybe I will actually learn Spanish for reals this time! One way I have started to take care of myself that I will definitely continue is reading books! I just love to read and am so pleased I have given myself the time to do so.
My family situation should be all over in a couple of months, and I don't want to look back and regret not taking care of myself for the entire length of our struggle. Please bear with me. All support is appreciated.